Geoff's abroad, about to seal the business deal of his career, when his personal assistant Margot goes missing in a local bazaar. But the souvenirs she finds there are listening... and prising the lids off their darkest secrets.
Dashing Onions' next production is The Listening Jar.
It's a one-off, 10 minute long horror. Roles are unpaid.
Audition deadline Midnight GMT on Saturday 23rd February, and lines then due by Saturday 9th March 2019.
Please send your auditions to Fiona at firstname.lastname@example.org
Please record your audition lines in Mono, 44,100 kHz
wav or flac.
Please send raw files with no noise-reduction or filters.
Go for as many parts as you like, each part in a separate file labelled Character name_your name, so eg. Man_OrsonWelles.mp3
Have loads of fun with it! We look forward to hearing them!
GEOFF (main role)
(M, American, 40s+ An experienced businessman, self-assured, direct, time is money and life is too short for small talk or niceties).
- 1) There you are! I was hunting all over for you. We don't have time for bazaars - Mr B is waiting on us to finalize the factory deal. (SOTTO) And you're being ripped off. This is junk! My kids could make something better than this!
- 2) (Terrified) What was that? Stop it! It's not my fault! I didn't mean to... stop it!!!
- 3) 20 seconds of screaming or roaring or droning or singing anything tuneless and not copyright(!), trying to keep a noise out. It doesn't have to be loud, more like an adult version of “lalalala not listening!” Or even a childlike version. Have a play! :-)
MARGOT (main role)
(F, any accent, any adult working age. She is Geoff's PA. Long-suffering, used to smoothing waters with his clients. Responsible, professional and kind.
- 1) I'm sorry! He's like this sometimes. Are you alright?
- 2) ...Thank you so much for your hospitality. We're delighted to be in partnership and (GOING OFF) I'll get back to you as soon as I can...
- 3) (WORRIED) I think you've caught the sun Mr Scott. Shall I postpone?
(Any non-American accent – feel free to experiment. Any gender. A knowledgeable and concerned owner of a shop).
- Francais? Espanol? English? Welcome to my shop!
- (URGENT, STARTING TO PANIC) You must come here! Right now! You must listen!
MR/MS B (Any gender. Factory owner, very polite but all professional. Not easily flappable).
- 1) Apologies for the delay! The main office is just up here. There is a good view of the workshop floor. Please follow me. We'll get this sealed and signed!
WORKERS' LINES – The audition contains all of them, so if you are successful you don't have to send any further lines. Feel free to improvise more if you'd like to.
If you do have a large JAM JAR or VASE at home and would like to send 2 versions, one with the lines said into the jar, one said normally, we are experimenting to find which sounds better!
A million thanks!
WORKERS (in US factory) – These can be any gender and any accent. Ideally 1 jam jar version of each, 1 not.
- 1) Outsourced?! (BEAT) Redundancies all round!
- 2) They're outsourcing the lot to some place where they can pay peanuts.
- 3) I got a family to feed. I put my life into this company.
- 4) What am I gonna do?
- 5) I can't afford to be laid off!
- 6) How do I tell my kids?
WORKERS (In a non-US factory, any genders, any accents). Ideally 1 jam jar version of each, 1 not.
- 1) Twelve hours a day! Never a rest!
- 2) I need more overtime to keep food on the table.
- 3) More overtime!
- 4) I'm so tired!
- 5) Three injuries this week! Keep your eyes on what you're doing people!
- 6) A hundred units a day. That's what the big boss wants or we all lose our jobs!
- 7) Come on!